Sunday, June 03, 2007

live more...

walking down a by lane near brigade, today, i saw this old lady with crutches fallen on the footpath, on the opposite side of the road. she was crying bitterly, had bandages on both her ankles. her screams were piercing the cloud of noise, and making people uncomfortable. and i stood there for a second and walked on.
few steps and i saw a dog, a black n grey pom i guess, really bad coat, limping a bit, with a brown collar, most probably abondoned. and i don't know why but i felt more compassion for the dog then for the lady. thought of picking him up, doing something, then suddenly thought what does that say about me, have more compassion for dogs then people.
also was wondering, what drives us to do some good things, have always found me to be totally random, sometimes i do, sometimes i don't. still trying to find out what makes me do what i do in such places.
went to an animal shelter after that, CUPA in bangalore, beautiful place, they take care of all abondoned, sick, injured animals from the street and also help people out with their pets. saw all kinds of dogs in all kinds of situations, a couple who were starved so much, at the widest their chest n stomach were no more then my index finger. one whoes paw had been crushed. one who was so afraid of being tied up, he was pulling his chain with all his strength, people there said he does it always, every day, every second.
some had been so brutalised, u could see the fear for the human stench in their eyes, my friend thought, a dog not coming to him for petting was the dogs attitude, what did he know, it was not attitude but fear.
they all, though, had a spirit to live. they wanted to be petted, n scratched,
and there was still life. there were atleast 50 puppies, all born there, and some were so small, so cute.
n then there was a pug, his hind legs was paralysed, couldn't get up, and was put in a cage. he coudln't get up, couldn't move, all he could do was sit on his hind, and he was hungry, desperate for love. his eyes were gorging out at the sight of us there, he wanted so much love. and i, today felt helpless. for once, i could get over my coldness to feel in my heart. the vet lady, said, almost pleadingly, we r looking for someone who can give 24 hours to him, else he won't survive. and i just stood their. helpless.
was thinking, dogs too have their luck, the hutch pug makes a lac a year, is carried in a lap at all times, n this one is just waiting to be touched, to be petted. he didnot even know how to absorb when we were petting him, wanted more, even when we were scratching him, he was afraid that it will go away, n only if he could collect it in a box and get it out whenever he wanted it.
ever felt like that, when u wanted to capture someones love n care, because u knew it wouldn't be there for long..!
there were a couple of just born monkey kids, afraid at first, n showing off their skills after sometime. cuddling with each other, in their fear n their joy, because they knew there was no one else.
ever felt like that, u become close to someone u don't necessarily like, simply because of the time u spend with them, u start caring, even if u don't love. because thats the only one u can share with, sharing ties the bond.
we are living without any objective today, just living, a conversation a day before, look how firangs live for something more then jsut money n a good life and just plain fun, look at us, living for the weekends.
get over whatever is stopping u, start living.
live more. i want to...
take care.

1 comment:

  1. touched, ridiculed, emotional or I can even put it as a day's idea, tomorrow I should carry atleast a few percentage of what I read. That would, otherwise define cold.

    Life... I am smiling.

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