Saturday, April 28, 2012

thoughts and ramblings

there has suddenly been a lot of focus on introverts...a book, a TED video, a question asked and many conversations. I am an introvert (always knew it, and retook the test as well, 100% introversion is what it says), but most people are surprised when I tell them that. Am very good at public speaking, and I have lots of acquaintances (820 of them if u go by my FB friends list) plus am known to conduct parties and social events and how can I be an introvert. Well there you go, you don't understand introversion. Its different from being shy and quiet, its all about where you get your energy from. If you get it from inside you, you are an introvert. If your ideas excite  you more, if living in your own mind and your own small little world makes you peaceful, you are an introvert. signs of introversion, you feel suffocated after you have been in a crowd for some time, after every conversation with someone (esp if they are like 2 - 3 other people) you wanna go back to you shell and recuperate, because conversations are energy sapping for you. If your own ideas excite you more then talking to someone else, you are an introvert.
So that said, is it a bad thing? from my point of view introverts are finely balanced, they are quite self dependent for their ideas and all, and so come up with original out there stuff, which I don't see a lot of extroverts doing. Secondly, since they are not really shy, they are able to propagate these ideas and work in teams. Its just that sometimes its socially awkward for a group of extroverts to work / party with introverts, because introverts kind of are quite observing kinds, and so sap out the energy out of work meetings, parties et al. But I am a part of a very extrovert group, both at work and home, and they have gotten used to it. The other thing about introversion is we stay quite only with people we consider strangers, but once we have made good friends with people, they become an extension of us and so we talk easier. 
so that was my take on introversion...why, well someone again questioned that I am not an introvert, and someone really senior at work, in a 'culture' session, said that there is no place for introverts in the firm. and that pissed me off, what he was saying is there is not place for shy people, but then him being so senior, can't attribute this to his ignorance and let it go. Well most imp person in tech in blr, you shall not gain my respect!!!

wow for thoughts and ramblings, this is already quite long. 
anyways point wise now
1. young people (including when I was in that age group) are more concerned about their privacy and letting info out and holding on to stuff and more controlling and what not. saw this in a couple of instances this week, someone finally made me friends on fb, but still nothing is shared. and someone in a causal social fun event wanted everyone to behave and all...I used to be like that, always wanted to hold on to my secrets, no one knew about her for the longest of times, and always wanted some discipline when i used to lead. Not sure when i changed and why, well for the first secrecy thing, it was conscious, i decided to let go, for a period of time everyone around me knew everything about me, and guess that was a bit extreme, but today a lot of people know a lot about me and that has helped make stronger friendships. on the other part, the controlling factory, guess it was just experiences i guess. the thing with controlling something is that you have to hold really tight something to control it, but things still escape out, and that makes you feel irritated and you react in angry doesn't help at all...better is to have a few key rules, and thats it. these rules are the ones that matter the most, and which handle the most grave consequences...let the rest pan out. The environment will be more relaxed, and because there are few rules, people kind of feel morally responsible. 

2. its amazing how people can be so predictable sometimes, or maybe experiences enable you to predict some people so well...I was able to predict someones moves so well today was surprised. I don't know if there are just a limited number of stories and limited number of moves in the worlds, but man, someone surprise something which I haven't anticipated...all the same moves, all the same games!!!

3. So the eternal question of what should you do...what you love or what you are good at, well I am doing ok at something that i neither love, nor am good at. but thats a different thing. if what you love is what your are good at, then ur golden. In my case I don't know that yet!

4. Being different is something I have always done, its a driving force behind everything i do, be different, think different, live different. I don't think it started out because I just wanted to be different for the sake of it, but really because i had come from a different background, was differently natured and like different things. But yep, a contributing factor was also the want to stand out. anyways, i lost my way for sometime but trying to get back there. 
what i wanted to say and maybe this deserves a post of its own is that thinking that you develop from wanting to be different helps. being different in the frist place, doing things differently in itself brings you attention (many time negative, but as i always say infamy is a way to being famous), it brings something fresh, unexpected and so the buzz is always inbuilt, its different so it has to be original. The risks are higher, risks of rejection, but once you start on that path, you kind of get a hang of how much you can push the rubber band before it snaps. And most important is that as long as you are not being different for just the sake of it, as long as there is a logical rational reasons behind it (or you can conjure one up), people take it as, 'oh well he tried something diff, and failed' and you can take solace to it as well.

So last line, be different, not for the sake of it, but because thats the only way to stand out for urself and making the world more colorful. else everyone everywhere would be just the same!!!

was itching to write but clearly just wanting to write and writing well are two different things, and this time the first didn't lead to the second. :(

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